I can’t do anything else when I feel very sad and angry. It is as if  I had a very heavy stone in my heart! At a time like this, all I can do is listen to music.  This happened to me today, and now finally I can do something.. I got better but I still cannot do anything what I have to do now, this is why I am writing this now.. so that I can have a peaceful state of mind!

To write something often brings me a better state of mind. In the process of writing, I can be more objective and more positive.

I have felt sad and angry because of something that happened to one of my loved ones. Whenever my loved ones get emotionally hurt by someone or have experienced something bad or unpleasant, I feel as if I were “them.” I sometimes emotionally merge with them. This “emotionally merge” thing happens to me when they get touched or are in great joy also.

In a situation like this, I get angry, sad, touched, or become happy with them, and sometimes I even cry with them.

In the case of today, he became sad and angry because a woman was rude and lacked sensitivity. I merged with him emotionally somehow, and his sadness and then anger were brought to me. At first I felt very sad but soon sadness turned to anger, and I started to think how I could revenge her instead of him (actually now that I calm down and think about the situation, what she did was not worth a revenge lol) and made a concrete plan, and then I told him this plan. Then suddenly he started laughing, saying “Oh, that would be too much!! What if she kills herself? Hahaha!”

He mentioned this. Whenever this kind of thing happens to me, I feel and think too intensively, much more intensively than they do, moreover in an extreme way, and this sometimes makes the situation look like somewhat unintentionally comical and makes them feel better emotionally.

He said he felt better and he would be able to manage this by himself. Funny thing is that I haven’t felt better yet, I still hold some kind of a grudge against the woman I have never met in my life lol

This kind of thing often happens to me and my loved ones.. my family and my closest friends.

This reminds me of something in Finland that happened to me and my other loved one. We went to the graveyard and visited a grave of my friend’s family. It was around Christmas (before or on the day of Christmas, I guess) I vividly remember that night. It was a very beautiful and solemn place. My friend suddenly started crying because she got deeply moved somehow. She said suddenly she got moved and she remembered my deceased mother who she had never met. Then I merged with her emotionally and somehow I also started crying with no reason!!

I wrote this listening to this song repeatedly. I thought this song might have made me feel better. I love this song! Beautiful song..  Hmm I feel a little bit better now?

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Article source: http://blog-en.purestpurple.com/2014/12/13/the-guilded-hand-is-a-beautiful-song/